St. Brelade, Jersey

I love bank holiday weekends but they always throw me off, hence the lack of post last night...

I've literally been so busy of late that my posts are half-assed anyway which is why I tend to just post reviews.

But, I did promise more on our time in Jersey and when better to sit down and write a proper post than on a bank holiday Monday?

We'd agreed that this time round we would get up early every day so we could fit as much in as possible (when we went to Oxford it kind of all went pear-shaped cause we overslept! Which also has to do with my weird thing where I cannot for the life of me sleep in a hotel. Strange, but I managed in this one!!).

So we started our day off nice and early, down for the breakfast and then out of the hotel between 10 and 11.

Before heading for St. Brelade, we quickly ran across the road to look at the beach again - we fell in love with it.

After taking a few - hundred - snaps, we took the car and made our way to St. Brelade Bay. It was absolutely stunning. The sun was out and I don't think I've ever seen the sea that blue before. Because it was early March as well it was so quiet and peaceful.

We wandered along the beach drinking in as much of the view as possible stopping in a tourist shop to by some fudge (they are very proud of their Jersey cows so really advertise it in all possible products!)

Next we drove to a golf country club (unbeknownst to us at the time - I just thought it was a regular golf place) in which we went on the driving range (I was so so awful) before having lunch at Rocco's.

Adeel took every opportunity to have steak as possible it seemed, but I stuck with a ham and cheese toasty as we had plans for a date night dinner that evening.

Another thing we also noted on was how nice everyone was. Nobody was in any hurry to get anywhere. The fastest speed you could go was 40mph, and everyone was just so polite and conversational - it was wonderful.

I think we had a short break at the hotel after that - somewhat of a siesta if you like - before heading to an arcade. We literally played air hockey and a shooting game, Adeel won a stuffed toy on a claw machine and we left.

We had a bit of down time before getting ready for dinner. We'd asked the receptionist at the time for a recommendation and she kindly booked us a reservation with her friend's restaurant The Paper Fig.

Now, I haven't put any photos in of the restaurant or food because I want to write a full post on it. It was just perfect. And that's all I'm saying about it in this post!

After we returned from our heavenly culinary experience we dipped into the pool once more before hitting the sheets...

🏝

Memories And A Future Home

This past weekend I actually made an effort to go and see my little sister for once. I normally just seem to wait until my dad asks me to come down to his and she's either there or she isn't.

I was worried it would be a little awkward, what with not seeing her mum since her and my dad's divorce or spending any alone time with Holly... Ever. I mean, what do you even talk about with an eleven year old?

Anyways, it was completely fine. She chatted away amiably for the 6 or so hours we were together. I took her to my favourite park which we both just so happen to have visited countless times - Kelsey Park in Beckenham. We ambled around without an aim in the world, except for feeding the squirrels and ducks of course.

We wandered by the golf course but it was closed which was odd, so we grabbed an ice cream and continued feeding the wildlife along the way. After running out of bread we decided to head to the cinema as some thunderstorms were due in the afternoon.

We saw The Secret Life of Pets. It was an okay-ish film, but an easy one to watch nevertheless. Once the film was over we grabbed a bite to eat at Zizzi's, the one known for being the place David Bowie performed his first gig at I believe, when a pub stood there previously.

As we still had an hour and a bit to kill before I took her back, we headed back to the park to feed more squirrels and see if the golf course was open. It was and even though we heard a loud rumble of thunder in the distance, we decided to brave it and play anyway.

Of course, when we got to hole number two it decided to start raining, the thunder getting louder and louder as we went along and the rain plummeting down. We continued on nevertheless. Definitely a new experience!

But, after a good day, you know what stood out to me? Seeing this couple in the cinema, or, I should say, family.

Just before the lights went down a man and a woman came in with another man not far behind them, a toddler holding the woman's hand and a baby curled around the first man's torso. I'm not going to go into details of why this stood out to me because it could come across wrong, like I don't know how to explain it without sounding weird. But, the point is, they gave me hope.

I always get these moments where my hope dwindles and I wonder if me and A will ever get through our current issues, or why it's so hard or if it can even work. And then I see all these couples and it never really helps. But seeing this couple did, and it got me thinking about all sorts of memories.

Do you ever feel like there are specific scenes in your life that stand out in particular to you? They may seem like nothing at the time and then you find yourself not being able to stop thinking about them.

I have one from a few years back when things weren't going great. It was in the heat of summer, I actually had a day off of work and Adeel was visiting. We were literally just laying in our underwear on the bed sideways, a fan blowing cool tendrils over our skin and some unimportant game on in the background from the World Cup. His arm lay over me. I could feel his warmth behind me even though it was a sweltering hot day and, in that moment, life was perfect.

That memory got me through some of the tough times that came after. I don't know why because it probably didn't mean a thing to him, but it was so serene and uninterrupted.

It's moments like those that actually tend to be perfect and something you wish could go on longer.

And now I have another one from two weekends ago. Similar to the first, but different in so many ways regarding our headspace and the situation. I hadn't seen him in two weeks due to family commitments on both our parts and he came for the Friday night of that weekend. We literally crawled into bed, all snuggled in the dark and the rain was pouring outside.

For nights after and, even now, almost two weeks later I still can't stop thinking about it. It hasn't been needed to help get me through any panicky moments, because I'm glad to say that rarely happens anymore. The reason I can't stop thinking about it is because it's a sign of the future, something to look forward to every night. It doesn't have to be pouring outside but I get to know that I will always have him to come home to. No matter how good or bad a day was, I will always be able to curl up beside him and fall into a safe and peaceful sleep.

I don't know what brought this stream of thought on, but I guess it's just been one of those weeks where I've been able to appreciate what I do have.

I suppose the couple in the cinema and the memory from a couple of weekends ago just seemed to click into place making me feel unable to contain my excitement for the future.

A lot has happened this week that has made me think. Life is way too short to worry about all the crap that I do, and I know I can't seem to stop wishing away the present so the future will be here, but I've definitely been appreciating the smaller moments a bit more, the simple moments that are overlooked daily.

I've even been thinking back to the first days, weeks and months that I met Adeel and how everything has changed but gotten so much better.

Those moments will last a lifetime in my mind even if I can't paste them into a blog post or a scrapbook physically, they will always be with me because they are the moments that get me through, the moments that made us who we are and the ones I will treasure.

I know this post was probably a bit ramble-y, but I like doing these sort of ones. I feel like I can get more off of my chest and open up about things, in a healthy way, that have been bothering me.

Thanks for reading if you got this far.

✌