Stopping Negativity

I read a post the other day that said something along the lines of "you should own your successes" and that got me thinking about the way I've been handling things.

I am so negative in general that I get on my own nerves at times. I always see the bad side and, well, I can be way too serious. I haven't even taken credit for getting my current job. Yes, it was partly luck or fate or whatever you call it with the timing that I got picked for the work experience out of all of the candidates in the first place that led to my job. But even so, was it a coincidence or did something on my CV stand out to grab their attention?

Even so, just me applying in the first place was through my own initiative and no one else's. Plus, the working super hard to make a good impression during my work experience evidently paid off, setting me up in the future for this job.

Every time I have spoken to someone about my job, I made it out to be a "lucky break" and that doesn't do much to help my confidence. I applied for the job, I worked hard, I got the job. I am responsible for my own future, not luck.

I've also been pretty negative in the past about my other job opportunities. Although waitressing (I was actually a food runner, but who even knows what they are unless you've been in that industry?!) wasn't the best fit, it was ideal at the time. I earned money and valuable skills whilst doing so. I'm not one to particularly enjoy a whole group of peoples company, especially tourists, but that job definitely helped me to gain confidence, strength (physically and mentally!) and a lot of patience. Plus, I occasionally got some tips and not all of the shifts or my colleagues were terrible. Free food with a beautiful view at the end of my shift was also a nice bonus.

And where do I start with Photography? Although I may have thought the teacher's methods were a pain in the ass and I didn't enjoy the majority of the projects or my classmates (what is it with the arts and stuck up snobs?), I think pursuing photography - even if just at academic level - plays a huge part in who I am and where I am today. If I hadn't of studied it I wouldn't have met the people I have done, and those ones are some of the most important ones. So, no, I wouldn't change that for the world no matter how aggravated I got repeatedly with all of my photography teachers over the five years of college and uni.

Now, the one I'm still struggling with at times - house sharing. This is constantly a battle for me sharing with multiple tenants. Especially when there's a partial language barrier between some of us. I can't stand mess and the tiniest of things get on my nerves, but at the end of the day it's a roof over my head, plenty of opportunities to meet and socialise with people I wouldn't normally have done so with, new languages to learn, new friends and a home in London. Having said all of that, I can't wait for September when I can move in with Adeel - and that's when all the fun begins and we have to learn to put up with each other's annoying little habits full time!

So here's to positivity - may I try harder to be a better, happier person, to enjoy life instead of moaning about it and to appreciate everything I do have.

And what better time to start it than my birthday month ☘

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How To Live With People You Don't Get On With

When you have to of course.

Whether it's a sibling, parent, other half, friend or a complete stranger, it's never good to snap at someone over something that probably isn't even that big of a deal. Which could also probably have been avoided or talked about calmly. God knows everyone has bad days, hell, I sure have, but that can make living with someone a total nightmare and incredibly uncomfortable if you end up arguing all the time.

If this said someone is rude to you, or messy or keeping you awake at night, talk to them first. If you do it politely they are more likely to listen to you and do as you are asking, whereas if you shout at them, you may not get anywhere with your issue.

I've had firsthand experience at asking my housemates calmly to be quiet the following morning as well as exploding at them in the middle of the night because I couldn't take it anymore. And guess which one worked the best?

If you can't talk to them about it or they continue to ignore your polite requests, find something that calms you or, just remind yourself, living with someone you don't get on with isn't forever. Hopefully. Count down the days until you can move out if needs be.

Living with family, friends or other halves is probably more of a learning curve of compromise and gritting your teeth. Plus, you probably wanted to live with them at some point. Whereas, living in a shared house is just ideal at the time.

I have 3 housemates that, I don't know whether it's because of their culture, but are incredibly, incredibly noisy all of the damn time. Whether it's stomping up the stairs, or slamming their bedroom doors or even just talking in the kitchen - which by the way is the furthest point in the house from my bedroom. Then there's one of them that constantly looks and talks down on me, who has such a close-minded view of things that it is very infuriating to try and get my point across. In fact, I'm pretty sure he does things just to annoy me sometimes.

It helps that I've got at least one housemate I get on really well with. We both feel the same pains and talking about it together is a good way to vent our feelings! If not, then I usually rant over the phone to my boyfriend or my mum! Lucky them.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is: not everybody gets along fine all of the time. You just have to look at things rationally and try to keep a cool head whether you like it or not. Living in Uni halls and now a shared house for the past three years has definitely enabled me to learn about what I'm like to live with as well as many other types of people!

Only a few more months and maybe, just maybe, I can finally move out of this place...


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